We love to protest, don't we? Protest the evil! And the good! And the in between. Protest the men and the women and the children and the sick and the healthy and the dogs and the cats and the rats and the bats and the theists and the atheists and the gays and the straights and the rich and the poor and everyone else! Oh look! Something I find distasteful! Let's talk a bunch of shit about it and then post a picture about it on Facebook. Oh look! I got a like on my status about how much it totally sucks that some people can't get water! I totally did a lot. Oh, I'm so good at photoshop. I will photoshop devil horns on some guy I don't like. That'll show him! That guy, you know him! Yeah, that guy from that one group that has different thoughts than I do. That group...you know that group? That group I feel has no right to exist on the basis of them not agreeing with everything I say. Oh? That man is is not tolerant of other people or their opinions? FUCK THAT GUY! What's fun to protest? The corporations! Yeah they're so evil and rich! What is a corporation, anyway? Doesn't matter, it's an evil sounding word! It reminds me of boring old men in suits I wouldn't look good in! Let's all go to a park and not really do anything and be very unclear about what we want. Let's ruin a park. Let's sing songs and hold hands until the evil corporations stop being evil and corporationy. Let's make some clever signs and scream into a megaphone. Let's not shower and make people. What will we call our movement? Occupy! There you go! And fuck the church as well! What will be our symbol? A Guy Fawkes mask...That'll work. What was Guy Fawkes famous for again? Whatever. We're young and edgy and we want to be mad at something. But wait...I'm tired. I want to take a shower. I don't want to do this anymore. Where is all the change that was supposed to come from us playing guitar and holding hands and holding up peace signs and middle fingers simultaneously? Ugh, this is so frustrating! What's the bandwagon these days? Russia? Oh goody gumdrops, I have tons of funny designs I can make on photoshop! This will be much easier! I can protest Russia. The country...not the people, because let's be honest, I don't know jack shit about them or their country. Then again I did watch some James Bond films...Okay, I can incorporate that into my photoshop designs...no, not incorporate. That sounds like corporation! Nope, I will protest the whole nation and talk shit about it and all its citizens and make a bunch of points about how I, along with my country, am better than Russia and Russians. What can I do? Write Putin a letter? Damn, I don't know Russian or German (he speaks both fluently). Oh wait, it's a sovereign nation and they do not answer to me. What am I protesting again? Doesn't matter, it's Russia! Fuck them in general and boycott them! Let's not buy any of their stuff like...uh...what do we buy from them? Uh...fuck it. Boycott the country in general! Boycott snow and cold weather! Boycott the letter "R." Should I go to Washington and protest in front of their embassy so that the Russian government can not care about what I think in close proximity to their building? No, I don't feel like it. Should I go to San Francisco and protest in front of their consulate so that they can not care about what I think in close proximity to me in nicer weather? Nah. Oh wait! I can always post some semi-witty post on my tumblr! CAT! DRINKING VODKA! RUSSIAN VODKA DRINKING A CAT! SOVIET RUSSIA JOKES WITH A SOCIO-POLITICAL SLANT REGARDING BIGOTRY AND FREEDOM OF SPEECH! CAN I HAZ FREEDOM? MORE CATS! MORE VODKA! MORE PHOTOSHOP! MORE RUSSIAN! LET'S TAKE DOWN THE THING THAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND! Damn, I am not satisfied yet! LET'S THROW A PROTEST WITH GIMICS LIKE PAINTING OUR FACES AND INCORPORATE...er...I mean...use...yeah use...THE HAMMER AND CICLE IN SOME WAY, EVEN THOUGH THERE IS NO MORE SOVIET UNION, NOR HAS THERE BEEN SINCE 1991! LET'S HOLD IT AT A LOCAL COLLEGE CAMPUS AND DISTURB A BUNCH OF PEOPLE INSTEAD OF DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT! Oh gosh, my ego is getting a really good stroking. Let's bitch and moan about something we cannot possibly hope to change so that we wouldn't really have to do anything. Let's distract ourselves from doing something that may actually help someone, somewhere. Because I am an artist and volunteering at a nursing home or a soup kitchen is beneath me. *Exhale*
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